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hold your breath, swallow seven times.
25 December 2012 @ 08:42 pm
Logging in over here for the first time in well over a year is just mindblowing and sort of upsetting. It's incredible how much a person can change in the span of 18 months. But those 18 months for me formed the bridge between my adolescence and my adulthood. It shaped me into a different person. Perhaps not a better one... but different. And reading through some of these old works I've posted (or even just reading their titles and tags) makes me laugh, cry, cringe, spring for the delete button and wish for the days of long ago to come back.

I lost my touch at fic writing when I got more heavily involved into online role play. I was finding it difficult to remember what was canon and what was my own character development. I found it equally as hard to work the minds of multiple characters at once, without having a partner to bounce back onto. I also began to find it boring to write for no guaranteed or familiar audience. Will this fic ever get reads? Will it get comments? I'm not certain - but this role play post will.

Now though, I'm less concerned with the fun and allure of role play for it's interactivity and community feel. I've gotten it out of my system, so to speak, and I'm once again finding myself loving writing for the intimacy of it. A moment spent with myself and my favorite canons or new originals. A few days, a week, a month spent in a world that I can create for me. And for anyone who should so choose to join.

And, so, I am here writing this as a precursor to whatever is about to come. It's a thank you to all of the friends I've made here on LJ, as well as an apology - for whatever I may be about to create is likely going to feel much different than what you may be used to seeing from me. I may also consider archiving over at AO3. There is a lot of fic on this journal that I am not entirely proud of, both in content and in skill. But I can't seen to find the heart to delete or edit these old posts, they were such a big part of me. So instead of weeding the past, I'd like to more carefully build the future.

Those of you close friends and followers who may wish to keep updated, don't worry! I'll likely be posting (or at least linking) right here. Those of you who have no idea who this is popping up on your flist, I thank you for finding me friend worthy once upon a time, and I wish you well!

Enc. [All my love.]
hold your breath, swallow seven times.
31 December 2011 @ 11:33 pm
So, I read fic. I read it a lot. And I'm kind of really into it, in the sense that I actually love to go back to re-read and rec things to others. I like to keep track of what I read, and, well... I kind of never do. I just literally read shit and move on, and then a month later I'm wishing I'd at least bookmarked it, or something. So, this post was made, as a sort of ongoing rec post in which I will link every worthwhile-of-mentioning fic I read in the year twenty-eleven. Yeah. It's gonna get huge.

This isn't really an official rec post of any kind; I won't add any suggestions (unless I read them), and I'm not really confident in presenting this to anyone as a source. It's more of a track record, just for myself, buuut if you happen to find it useful, then I'm glad I could help. Likewise, just because something isn't on this list, doesn't mean I haven't read it. I'm literally only linking out fics read within this year.

Anywhore, this is all TL;DR now, so I'll just STFU and get to it. Onward, son!

...and i was in my pajamas for every single second of it.Collapse )
Current Mood: curiouscurious
Current Music: Infinity Guitars - Sleigh Bells
hold your breath, swallow seven times.
Pity This Busy Monster by helena_eternal
♦For crowley_bigbang 2011
♦No affiliation with Mark Sheppard, Misha Collins, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Tom Hardy or Rob Benedict
♦Supernatural © Eric Kripke | Inception © Christopher Nolan

How am I supposed to plod through a werewolf novel if there's no caffeine chugging through my veins?Collapse )
Current Mood: sleepysleepy
Current Music: Time - Ozzy Osbourne
hold your breath, swallow seven times.
09 April 2011 @ 05:16 am
Title: Say My Name, Wear It Out
Pairing: Jared Padalecki/Jensen Ackles
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Office!Au, semi-public, slightly dub-conny (but not at all dark)
Spoilers: None
Words: 1,600
Summary: Working with Jensen Ackles is hell on Earth, until it feels like heaven. Or, "That one where hatred and unresolved sexual tension may be the same damn thing".
Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue. (Read full disclaimer here.)
Notes: Whoa! Hey look! I'm back! With Supernatural RPS, at that! God, it's been too long. This was something I started as a fill for some prompt in some meme, both of which I've lost. It's shameless porn, with cocky!Jensen, and blundering!Jared. There's coffee and Kleenex and sticky notes. You know. You know. Title by Rihanna.

I... I wasn't asking for a demonstration.Collapse )
Current Mood: sleepysleepy
Current Music: Where Dem Girls At - David Guetta ft. Flo Rida
hold your breath, swallow seven times.
05 April 2011 @ 04:18 am
I haven't posted in almost a month? I haven't replied to over 200 comments and messages? I haven't even sent out thanks for a bunch of vgifts? What is this!?

So, this week, I'll be dedicating some time to getting on top of that shit, and... possibly... posting some Kurtofsky? No promises, since, clearly, I've become very scattered this month. But LJ is my husband. Or child. Or pet. Or... something. What I'm trying to say is, it's fucked up when I'm away from it. So this week... is LJ appreciation week? I... I don't know, expect fic. Lots of it. And a new layout, I'm so over this one.

Current Mood: distresseddistressed
Current Music: Faster Babe - 2AM Club
hold your breath, swallow seven times.
15 March 2011 @ 06:14 am
Title: Professor Paranoid (I Would Give it all to Not be Sleeping Alone)
Pairing: Max Adler/Darren Criss
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Brief mention of Max/OFC
Spoilers: None
Words: 8,300
Summary: When Darren shows up for a weekend at Max's, everything changes; there's no going back.
Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue. (Read full disclaimer here.)
Notes: For a fic under 10k, I got to say... this mother wrecked me. I can't even deal with the amount of blood I put into this thing, who knows why it was so rough on me, but it's here now!!!1!(!!)! Written for tooursavior in the gleerpsx exchange. Huge props to snarkgasm, who listened to me ramble about this thing for weeks on end. Like, baby, what? Why... why did you not punch me? All lines that may slightly resemble those written by Ke$ha, eh, yeah... they probably were. Since apparently, she makes a lot of valid points when it comes to how Crissler exists in my headcanon.

Prompts used; Domestic bliss when they stay together over a weekend. Wearing each others shirts, kissing noses, lazy afternoon loving, relieving tension, romantic, real intimacy that isn't sex (although sex would be a bonus).

Thought I was just havin' a really good dream.Collapse )
Current Mood: draineddrained
Current Music: Codex - Radiohead
hold your breath, swallow seven times.
23 February 2011 @ 03:38 am
Title: Boy, the way You Blowin' up My Phone
Pairing: Sam Evans/Will Schuester
Rating: NC17
Warnings: Phonesex
Spoilers: Mild for BIOTA
Words: 2,200
Summary: Sam Evans is a teenage boy with a painfully throbbing crush on Will Schuester. And now? Well, now he also has his phone number.
Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue. (Read full disclaimer here.)
Notes: Well, clearly it had to happen. Title by Beyonce and Gaga.

Sam, this is inappropriate.Collapse )
Current Mood: boredbored
Current Music: Seventy Times Seven - Brand New
hold your breath, swallow seven times.
22 February 2011 @ 04:25 am
Title: Go Right at the First Stoplight
Pairing: Finn Hudson/Noah Puckerman
Rating: R
Warnings: Het, slash, drug abuse, language, prostitution, you know.
Spoilers: None
Words: 2,300
Summary: It's 2011 and Finn and Puck have high hopes; New York is just around the corner. It's 2018 and New York is rainy. It's been a year and a half since Finn's heard Puck's voice.
Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue. (Read full disclaimer here.)
Notes: First and foremost... I was incredibly fucking high when I wrote this. I make no further excuses. Based not-so-subtly on "Your Name Here (Sunrise Highway)" by Straylight Run, and the Jesse Lacey/John Nolan feud that spawned it. It's incredibly angsty. I don't know what just happened.

We can start a band, man, you're such a kickass drummer!Collapse )
Current Mood: melancholymelancholy
Current Music: Bigger Than Us - White Lies
hold your breath, swallow seven times.
19 February 2011 @ 06:02 am
Completely irrelevant to anything ever, but sweet grilled cheesus, I want these cuties in my life. In completely different ways, mind you, but, you know... let's not get into specifics.

And just to keep this post from being entirely pointless, let's spend some more time flailing over men with children.

Current Mood: impressedimpressed
Current Music: Come On - Ben Jelen
hold your breath, swallow seven times.
19 February 2011 @ 04:44 am
Title: And All I've Tried to Hide
Pairing: Blaine Anderson/Dave Karofsky
Rating: PG
Warnings: Five Things fic
Spoilers: None
Words: 1,800
Summary: Five times Dave kept Blaine his dirty little secret, and the one time he didn't.
Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue. (Read full disclaimer here.)
Notes: Title by All American Rejects.

You looked good without all that gel in your hair today.Collapse )
Current Mood: mellowmellow
Current Music: Happiness is Overrated - The Airborne Toxic Event